You can run but you can't hide

Raise your hand if you have ever distracted yourself from facing your emotions or what you are experiencing in life in the moment.  Distractions come in many guises: eating, drinking, going online, watching t.v., even exercise, just to name a few.

I was reminded recently of an event in my life that occurred several years ago.  I attended the University of Montana, in Missoula, which operates on trimesters.  One of my girlfriends and I had a grandioso plan to skip winter quarter to go “work” down in the British Virgin Islands.  Well, we did go down south, but we did not work!  We ended up living and soaking in life on the island of Tortola for 2 1/2 months.  The last month of our stay, we found an efficiency to rent. It was pretty awesome, for a bit anyway.  At one point my dad came to visit for a week.  A couple of days after my dad’s visit, we got kicked out.  I’ll just say it was for being twenty-something-year-olds.  My friend and I WERE actually twenty-something-year-olds, and my dad had acted like one!  We packed up our backpacks and headed down to the beach to figure out our next plan of action. We literally had twenty dollars to our name and no place to stay.  We were hanging out at a bar on Cane Garden Bay beach eating, what could have been, our last meal for a while. There we were, sitting with our bags packed, two weeks left until we returned to the states, eating one of the lamest grilled cheese sandwiches ever made, wondering what to do.  Surprisingly, a woman from the hotel next door came out to the beach yelling “Is there an Erin Sullivan here? Erin Sullivan?”  By the aligning of the stars and the grace of God, we happened to be sitting right next door! I said, “My name is Erin Sullivan!”  She said, “Follow me, you have a phone call.”  This was in the early ’90s when landlines were a real thing!  I picked up the phone and this is what I heard ” You can run, but you can’t hide Erin Sullivan!”  My response: “Dad?!!!… Can you wire us some money?!!!”  I love this story!! The timing was so perfect!  It had been four days since my dad left. What were the chances that we were next door to the hotel my dad was randomly calling to see if, by some shot in the dark, my friend and I were at THAT beach?!
The part of the story that I want to bring to your attention is the part where my dad says “You can run, but you can’t hide!”  Back then, that saying meant to me that big brother is always watching (and apparently my dad too)! Ha!  When I was telling this story to friends the other day, I realized that these words have a different meaning to me today. Now, I interpret it more spiritually,  more introspectively.  I am not hiding my emotions from myself anymore.  I am living the fullest expression of my life.  I am not hiding behind the falsities of masks that I created for various reasons, whether it was to “fit in” to societal “norms” or to fit into someone else’s image of what is appropriate.  I am now living completely as ME! Embracing who I am fully! I can try running, but I will keep creating situations that bring up the same emotions until I feel them fully and completely!  Until I do, the emotions will keep coming up to be felt and expressed so I can learn the lessons that I am here to learn in this life and discover my truth.  You can only run from your truth for so long.  Each and every one of us has a purpose for being here.  That purpose or truth is waiting and wanting to be discovered.
You can run from your truth but you cannot hide from it.  Your truth is continuously trying to be discovered.  The experiences, circumstances, and situations you find yourself in during your life are happening to help you discover who you are.  What is YOUR truth that you have to share with the world?  This is the opening of your heart.  You know your truth when you follow your heart. Feeling ALL of your emotions that arise will guide you to living from your heart space.  Listen to what your heart is saying and feel ALL emotions that arise!
Now is the time!  Stop running and hiding!  Take off your masks, embrace who you are, and SHINE YOUR LIGHT! When you begin recognizing what distractions you use to NOT feel your emotions, you can start changing. Recognition is the first step. Then, take a breath, relax your body and ALLOW.
💜✨Much Love and light